Monday, November 1, 2010

VOTE...Early, VOTE...Often!

Enthusiasts Unite! Join with us in supporting the candidacy of Dan Gurney, running on a platform of unbridled automotive enthusiasm. Neither the Republicans nor the Democrats have taken any interest in the keen drivers' needs, hopes, desires, or innermost dreams, so we say the hell with them! We'll create a third stream—a vital new force in American politics that will sweep old ladies and small town speed traps from the highways and restrict winding two-lane roads to drivers of proved enthusiasm and skill. All drivers will have to pass through something like Carroll Shelby's school at Riverside, or one of the good English or European driving schools—the failures to be banished to public transportation. This will serve the dual function of improving local and state revenues, making railroads, airlines and local surface transportation companies solvent again, and clearing the jerks off the roads so that we paragons of impeccable, high-speed driving can have our way. Circa...1974.

If only life could be that simple!

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